The Art of Unlearning: Why Shedding Old Stories Is a Superpower

Do you ever catch yourself saying something like:

“I’ve just never been good at this...”
“I’m too old to try that.”
“People like me don’t get to do things like that.”

Yeah. I can be guilty of that too sometimes.

But here’s the ridiculous thing… we don’t just say it to other people. We say it inside our heads too!

Moving along through life like it’s a fact – a truth that’s carved in stone about who we are like it was presented to us as irrefutable evidence.

When in reality… that voice in your head?

It’s not speaking “truth”. It’s running an inner script that may have has zero basis in reality. A belief you developed a long time ago, that could have been handed to you as long ago as when you were in diapers.

This week’s podcast episode is all about those beliefs.
The quiet, sneaky, deeply-rooted ones.
The ones that live inside our heads like long-term tenants (that never pay rent).

What I’m talking about is limiting beliefs - and the sometimes messy but always freeing, and absolutely badass process of unlearning them.

So what is a limiting belief?

It’s something we’ve come to believe about ourselves… what’s possible… and even the world… that sound like truth in our heads – but isn’t.

They’re often really old.

But also often? They’re not even remotely accurate.

These kinds of beliefs can come from anywhere. Childhood family dynamics, that one-time humiliation we never forgot, things teachers said, or cultural conditioning – but what’s difficult to separate is that they are not related to who we really are.

They’re built from mental habits, shame we’ve internalized, and emotional pain we may have thought we’d long buried.

And your brain? It thinks it’s keeping you safe by holding onto them.

Some of mine? (Oh yeah… I’ve got a few). Things like:

“I’m not a numbers person.”

“I’m not good at public speaking.”

“I don’t have the education and credentials to be taken seriously.”

Any of those sound familiar? Maybe yours are different – but here’s a truth-bomb for you. We. All. Have. Some.

I’ve been carrying those beliefs around like they were my truth forever.
And I’d had them so long, they just felt like part of who I was.

But lately I’ve been holding them up to the light for a better look (because at my age you have to hold everything up to the light if you want to see it clearly 😄).

Now, when limiting beliefs show themselves - I’m starting to ask myself…

“Where did you come from?”
“Are you even mine?”
“Are you the truth… or am I just hiding behind you?”

“And if not, how can I re-write you – or at least tame you?”

Because here’s what I’m discovering…

Just because something feels true, doesn’t mean it is.
And just because we’ve believed it for a long time - doesn’t mean we have keep it.

A bit of transparency here - this isn’t like your weekend bathroom reno.

There’s no magic fix. No transformative mantra. No one-size-fits-all 5-step plan.

It’s slow.

It can be pretty emotional.

Sometimes? Pretty funny (‘cus come on… some of our limiting beliefs are pretty absurd).

And quite often, it’s uncomfortable.

What it is though - is doable.

Unlearning looks like:

• Writing out the crap you’ve believed about yourself
• Exploring where it came from (and maybe who handed it to you)
• Re-framing it with something that feels a little kinder… or more true
• Practicing that new belief over and over again - even if your brain keeps arguing that you should believe it

One of my favourite re-frames.

When I’m about to speak in front of a group and the nerves hit, I used to think, “I’m anxious. I’m going to throw up. I can’t do this.”

Now? I’ve trained myself to say, “This is excitement. This is what it feels like to care deeply. This means I’m doing something meaningful.”

It’s not about lying to yourself.
It’s about giving your brain a new lens.
A new way of looking at the thought.
A new story.

In the episode, I share more tools around thought re-framing, visualization, journaling (yes, again), mindfulness techniques, and even something called “The Rubber Band Trick” (no black top-hats and rabbits involved).

✍️ Journal Prompts from the Episode:

1. What is one belief I’ve carried for years that I now suspect might not be true?
2. Where do I think that belief came from?
3. If I could rewrite that belief into something more empowering, what would it sound like?

What if the secret to being happier and more at peace - and maybe even finding your next breakthrough - was already within yourself?

What if the most powerful thing you can do for your growth... is to unlearn?

So… what belief are you ready to release?

Just one. Start there.

Write it down.
Speak it out loud.
Challenge it.
Re-frame it.
And then take one tiny step that proves it wrong.

That’s the beginning of unlearning.
That’s the start of freedom.

🎧 Listen to the full episode now wherever you listen to your podcasts.

📥 And grab free resources anytime at: transformativejourneys.ca/johannas-toolboxes